Fear No Fear

(All scripture from Lexham English Bible, Copyright 2012 Logos Bible Software)

Nathan was a friend and prophet to David, but he was also a man of integrity. He did not hold back or turn aside when the Lord gave him instructions. He carried them out, regardless of personal feeling. Nathan is a godly example for all believers.

Nathan came and told David a story about a rich man and a poor man. It was presented as an actual occurrence of injustice, and Nathan seemed to be seeking David’s judgment on it. It is obviously hoped that David would realise the severity of his own actions and come to repentance on his own. He did not. Instead, he got angry about the injustice of a rich man with many sheep needlessly taking the one cherished sheep of the poor man – simply because he wanted to. David put aside his sense of mercy and pronounced a harsh judgment on the rich man, calling for four times restitution and his death.

A scriptural principle is having mercy so that the Lord can show us mercy (James 2:13; Psalm 18:25). David left the Lord with no choice but to judge Him without mercy – I’m so grateful we have a better covenant and ALL God’s judgment was placed on Jesus (Galatians 3:13). David called for a death: his son conceived in sin with Uriah’s wife died, two sons died, and twenty thousand soldiers died. David called for four times punishment: one son sinned like his father (and died), one son murdered like his father & took something that wasn’t his (causing thousands to die), his concubines were slept with by a claimant to the throne (losing their status, but cared for all their lives by David), and a daughter under his care was raped and disgraced (she committed no wrongdoing). This was judgment under a system were judgment on sin HAD to be fulfilled, and many people involved in the situation ALSO sinned.

Nathan turned up the heat and told David HE was the transgressor. He had done this terrible thing and he would be punished. Because David had killed with the sword, the sword would forever hang around his house. Because David DESPISED God, he would bear punishment. To sin is not only being willful, but it is despising God. We despise Him when we don’t obey. HIS words, not mine (2 Samuel 12:10). What David did in secret would be punished in public. God would NOT hide this and David WOULD be an example to others. Again, SO grateful Jesus took our punishment for us.

Saul once despised the Lord and was called on it. He blamed everyone but himself (1 Samuel 15). But here David IMMEDIATELY submits. Submits, takes ALL the blame, and humbles himself before the Lord. David should have been killed, but the deepness of his repentance (Psalm 51) turned that aside. God put away David’s sin so David wouldn’t die – it had already been put away, past tense, not waiting on David to DO anything (2 Samuel 12:13). But there were still consequences and judgment on him. One of the first was that the child of this sin would die because David gave opportunity for enemies of the Lord (foreign and domestic) to blaspheme God over it.

David fasted and prayed for the child. But it died in seven days. David picked up the pieces of his heart, comforted his wife Bathsheba, and they moved on with their lives. Their next child – not born in sin – was beloved of God and became David’s heir (it was Solomon). I don’t know Bathsheba’s mind in all of this, she certainly suffered her share of grief over the incident. But later in scripture SHE is the mother of the ‘King Lemuel’ pseudonym of Proverbs 31. She certainly became a very godly and wise woman, regardless of how she acted here. Remember she is NEVER called the one responsible, even if she let herself get seduced – and there is no evidence that it wasn’t rape by David, although her behaviour afterward in not coming forward (compare with Tamar in a bit) leans towards her letting herself be seduced/coerced instead of flat-out forced (which in NO WAY exonerates David even a little).

Next we head back to the war that wasn’t finished. The one with Ammon. Joab finally subdues the city of Rabbah by taking its water supply. He sends word back to David that he should come and finish taking the city or the credit would be Joab’s. David gathered the rest of his men and went to take the city. He was back doing what he had been appointed to do – lead – and got good results. A LOT of plunder was taken out of the city. He put all the people of Ammon to work doing hard manual labour. Then they all returned to Jerusalem.

“It happened afterwards that Absalom the son of David had a beautiful sister whose name was Tamar, and Amnon the son of David fell in love with her.” (2 Samuel 13:1)

Absalom and Amnon were birthed in Hebron, when David was king over only Judah. It’s likely he was about eighteen here and Amnon about Nineteen. David was around fifty or so. This would have been within a few years of David’s sin, at most. It specifies that Absalom was David’s son and HE had a sister. Most Rabbis believe that Tamar was EITHER not a daughter of David (it was most likely a political marriage and she may have had children before David) or a conquest bride – which would permit sex even if she hadn’t converted and would ritually consider any offspring not Jewish and therefore not a real sibling. Whichever it was, the family (David and his sons) would not consider Tamar a ‘real’ sister. HOWEVER, note that in Leviticus 18 the Law prohibited sex between step-siblings OR the offspring of either your mother or your father, even if you don’t share the other parent. So either way it was, this incident was TOTAL rebellion of the Law, not just of social conventions.

Amnon thought Tamar was beautiful. So beautiful that it made him sick. Don’t make this a love story. It isn’t. Love doesn’t make you sick. This was lust and unrestrained passion. Love is productive, kind, and thinks of the other person more than yourself. Getting itchy loins is lust. Getting sick (a negative) will NEVER come from love (a godly positive – 1 Corinthians 13 – which takes its model from God’s character). Tamar was also a virgin, so there were no circumstances that Amnon could take advantage of. She wasn’t slutty and didn’t compromise herself by teasing and innuendo. She had a sense of her worth and wasn’t hitting the meat markets.

Amnon had a friend named Jonadab, who was David’s nephew. He was a crafty man and did NOT use it in service to the Lord. Once he knew what was happening, he helped Amnon plan the rape of Tamar. Amnon feigned illness until David came to see him. Then he asked for special cakes (probably something like Jewish doughnuts (Sufganiyot) or Jewish pancakes (Levivot) made by Tamar in his presence. David either knew NOTHING about his kids, or was turning a blind eye because he was dealing with his own issues (remember, this is soon after his sin). David permitted it. Tamar obeyed. She’d have no reason to say no unless she’d noticed Amnon’s intentions – in which case she was either naive or uneasily obedient because she had to obey her step-father the king.

Amnon had everyone ordered out of the house and asked for Tamar to feed him herself. As soon as she got close he grabbed her. She MUST have cried for help at some point – her actions emphatically show she was NOT willing in ANY way. He demanded she sleep with him. She protested. She told him to ask David for her hand in marriage. She knew he would not refuse (lending credence to her not being related because siblings couldn’t marry – Leviticus 18). Amnon forced her, not heeding her cries (she called out – Deuteronomy 22:23-27), and raped her. After, he wanted her gone. He called in a servant and ordered him to take her out and lock the door. Lust satisfied, he despised her (and was maybe shamed by it himself, but it doesn’t appear so). He didn’t even call her by her name. Selfish man and hard-hearted.

She tore her clothes, put on ashes, and wailed her way home. She did NOT hide her disgrace. She did NOT seek to cover it up. She had done NOTHING wrong in ANY of it. Her brother Absalom saw her, IMMEDIATELY knew it was Amnon who had done it – which makes you wonder how little David knew his kids since he was so taken in and not expecting this kind of thing from Amnon. She stayed in his house and was traumatised by it all. David heard about it and was very angry. But does NOTHING. Perhaps because he had done the same he could not bring himself to punish Amnon. He should have done something. This was weak leadership. He already had publicly been called out about HIS sin, so he should have said something.

Absalom wouldn’t speak even a word to Amnon and waited two years (until he was twenty and could act as a free man, not a child) before he acted. He invited all the sons of the king to a party in Baal Hazor to celebrate the sheering of his sheep (he had a household and servants as a man). David hesitated, but in the end allowed all his sons to go – including Amnon as his representative (being the eldest). Absalom instructed his servants to wait until Amnon was drunk. When Absalom gave the signal, they were to stab him in the heart. He would take on ALL the responsibility for the murder. And they did. Amnon died and the rest of the sons panicked and fled – It’s unlikely Solomon would have been invited. He was at most twelve years old and probably much less (there are disagreements on when this took place), but it’s possible.

David was told all his kids were dead by Absalom’s hand, but Jonadab (remember him? The rape planner?) assured David that Absalom had harboured hatred for Amnon since his sister’s rape. He had no reason to kill the others. Again, it makes you wonder what David paid attention to if even this man noticed Absalom’s intentions these last two years but David didn’t. Also, why hadn’t Jonadab warned Amnon?

David’s sons made it back, very upset, and he got the whole tale. He was angry again, but also again did nothing. Absalom fled to Geshur to his maternal grandfather the king of Geshur and lived there three years. Meanwhile David mourned his boys – the dead one and the exiled one. Once David got over his grief for the dead one, he missed Absalom and wanted him home again. And still, nothing is done for Tamar by anyone but Absalom. No one helped her. No one comforted her. It is a SAD chapter in David’s life. Sin ALWAYS takes from us more than we want to pay.

David sinned. His sons were acting just like him (rape and murder). The apples judgment were beginning to fall.

Summary

Key Players: God, David, Nathan, Amnon, Tamar, Absalom

Key Themes: Sin, Repentance, Judgment, Revenge

Key Verse(s): 2 Samuel 12:5-6, 13-14; 13:1-2, 10-14, 21, 28-19, 37-39