Fear No Fear

(All scripture from Lexham English Bible, Copyright 2012 Logos Bible Software)

“Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek release. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife. But if you marry, you have not sinned, and if the virgin marries, she has not sinned. But such people will have affliction in the flesh, and I would spare you.“

1 Corinthians 7:27-28

Paul was not against marriage. Paul was not for staying single. Paul was for the Kingdom and he was for not sinning in a false idea of being for the Kingdom. Earlier in the chapter (verses 1-9) he makes it clear that if you have sexual desires, you should marry so that you aren’t tempted to sexual immorality. But he DOES warn that when you marry, your attention is going to be split. You will not be able to give your all to the Kingdom because you will have a spouse. That spouse will take some of your time and energy. Why? Because marriage is about self-sacrifice. Just like our relationship with Adonai. “Then Jesus said to his disciples, “If anyone wants to come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me” (Matthew 16:24). Marriage is the example, the type and shadow, of how we are to exist with Jesus.

Several of the apostles were married. Peter was married and his wife travelled with him. Being married doesn’t keep us from doing things for Adonai or performing what we are called to. In fact, in MANY ways we are much more successful when we have a spouse to partner with. They help us, they have their own strengths and talents, they are often called to their own complimentary ministry that we can help THEM with. We can rely on them and they can rely on us. It is a STRONGER unit with more resources, more possibilities, and better rest. It is a great comfort to have a partner with you in what you do. This is one of the things Ruach HaKodesh is teaching us. We are NOT alone. We are married and Ruach HaKodesh is here to remind us we are married. We are part of a unit. Being part of a unit means that the OTHER is just as, if not more important, than YOU.

“just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Matthew 20:28). Jesus lived a life where the OTHER was more important than He was. The FIRST other was the Father. “So Jesus answered and said to them, “Truly, truly I say to you, the Son can do nothing from himself except what he sees the Father doing. For whatever that one does, these things also the Son does likewise” (John 5:29). The SECOND other was humanity. “So when he had washed their feet and taken his outer clothing and reclined at table again, he said to them, “Do you understand what I have done for you?” (John 13:12). Both are models for us. We are to put the OTHER before ourselves, first Adonai and then humanity. This is marriage. Putting our spouse before ourselves. It doesn’t mean running yourself ragged or living only to please them. It means their welfare is your priority and we do what we can to support them, care for them, and help them be the best version of themselves that they can be. We don’t enable destructive behaviour. We don’t seek to dominate or control them. We work in tandem, as partners, to achieve the common goal of living life together. You can’t do that without some sacrifices. You can’t do that without operating in and from love. You can’t do that if you are your own first priority. It’s simple, but it can be VERY hard. Which is why we need to rely on Ruach HaKodesh so much.

Every lesson that Ruach HaKodesh teaches us about interacting, supporting, and being a servant to our spouse is ALSO a lesson in our relationship with Jesus. Adonai knew it was not good for us to be alone, which is why He communed with Adam (Genesis 3:8). Jesus came so that we could commune with Him again. We do that with and through Ruach HaKodesh, with and through Jesus, and with the Father. It requires that we make some sacrifices. We shouldn’t be focused on what WE want all the time. We need to think about what will bring glory to the Father. How can we bring Him glory on a day to day basis as we live our regular lives? Obey Him. Model His character. Seek Him and rely on Him as our Source. These are all things Jesus did and all things that Ruach HaKodesh reminds us we can do in and through Jesus finished work (2 Corinthians 5:21). We accomplish it by humbly submitting to Jesus. To put His needs (the glorifying of the Father and the spreading of His Good News) about our needs. His wants above our wants. To CHOOSE to sacrifice our way of living in favour of His Way of living. It is not an arduous choice. Jesus has ABUNDANT LIFE to offer. In ourselves and our broken ways we only have a shadow of that kind of life.

The affliction Paul speaks of is the enhanced distractions or the enhanced weight of the pull of ‘regular’ life. When we are concerned about the needs of our spouse, that is time we are not spending concerned about the needs of the Father (except where they match up). Paul is clear it is not a bad thing. But there is also a temptation to get caught up in the day to day and take our eyes off of Adonai. One way to ‘combat’ this is to remember to listen to Ruach HaKodesh and apply His lessons to both our spouse AND to Jesus. Because no matter which one we’re talking about we need to be sensitive to their needs, pay more attention, listen actively, support and cooperate with them, etc. If we always remember to ask how this could apply to our relationship with Jesus, it’s a lot easier to keep from forgetting the SPIRITUAL life we have as we enjoy the PHYSICAL reality of a human spouse and partner.

Daily Affirmation of the Goodness of Elohim: Genesis 3:8

“Then they heard the sound of Yahweh God walking in the garden at the windy time of day. And the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of Yahweh God among the trees of the garden.” Imagine a hot day. Full of humidity and rippling waves of intense heat. And then a breeze comes by. Cooling. Refreshing. Whether it is really soft and gentle or firm and vigorous, it is a BLESSING. Adonai often manifests as wind. From a mighty, rushing wind capable of toppling trees to a cool breeze rustling the leaves in the treetops. Adonai likes movement and sound combined together. The thing about wind is that it can’t be ignored. The smallest amount is detectable and the largest amounts can alter the physical landscape. The presence of Adonai is like that. it is NOTICEABLE. Small caresses to violent gusts. We always know it’s there. It changes the temperature of the atmosphere around us. It can be something at the back of our consciousness or the forefront of our minds taking up all the space. Adonai has chosen a way of being with us that can match every mood and every need. We can’t SEE the wind, but we hear and feel and are affected by the wind. What a great example of our relationship with Him. What a comforting thought. He is always with us. Even when we don’t see Him. Even when we are locked inside, we can see His effects outside. Always moving. Always matching the circumstances. Always able to have more. Always with us. What a GOOD God!

Your Daily Confession of Elohim’s Goodness:

I taste and see that Yahweh is good; I am blessed because I take refuge in Him.

Psalm 34:8